WOMEN IN TRANSITION – Your “aha!” moment and how to bank on it.
One of the things I was faced with when starting FitLux Beauty was answering the question of whether I should return to what I know – my career in higher education administration, where most of my work experience comes from, or do I take all that I’ve learned over the years – education, work and life experiences, interactions with people, consulting work to go in a different direction or path.
We all have those moments in life where a true awakening happens and we decide to change. We change the way we think. We change how we interact with others. We might even change our physical appearance as a means to start fresh. Some even change their religious affiliations as a result of a spiritual awakening. Bottom line is – the defining moment forces us to change.
So I would define “aha” moments as those circumstances or situations that happen to us in life that force us to change. They are typically of the traumatic kind and leave us in situations we probably never expected or wanted to be in to begin with. They cause pain. They hurt. They are uncomfortable. We don’t always know how we got there but we do know that you never want to be there again.
My first big “aha!” moment took place in early 2006 – I woke up in a hospital bed after being unconscious for 3 days.
The days and weeks that followed were a blur, filled with resentment and with more questions than answers. But one thing was clear – I needed to make a change and I sure as hell never ever wanted to experience that again.
I started documenting my journey and my transitions and came up with an idea I thought was brilliant. I created “True Transformations”. This was supposed to be a website and support system created for women. I had so many ideas going through my head. But I failed.
While the idea itself was great, my execution was lacking. Remember this as I continue to write installments: Execution. This is going to be your biggest and most important asset.
Of course throughout the years since then I’ve had several “aha” moments, following ideas, most of which were implemented but failed, while others transformed themselves into something else.
The recent passing of a very young family member and being in a very unhealthy working relationship put me over the edge. I began to really value my family and see who and what was important to me. Navigating through the pain and grievance of losing someone made me realize that in life you either take your chances or do something to change or you sit still and remain compliant to the standards others have set for you.
My latest “aha!” moment came during those last mentioned experiences. I decided to cease the moment and threw it all in and take my chances. I decided that it was time to stop certain things. I decided that the pain and suffering and all the emotional anguish I allowed into my life by the actions of others was destroying my self-esteem, and self-worth. I decided it was not only time to change, but to really put forward the ideas I had been developing for close to 6 years.
Change is scary. Most of us make all our decisions, especially those big ones, out of fear instead of out of love. Love for ourselves, love for what we know makes us happy, love for what we are passionate about.
Do I leave my financial stability to start something totally new? Do I move across country because I KNOW there is opportunity where I want to or need to be? Do I sever relationships I know are not healthy in order to regain my own sanity?
Those are some questions you need to ask yourself when you are faced with your “aha!” moment. They are probably the single most important revelation you will have when moving forward with a project or idea.
During your “aha!” moment, take notes, write down your ideas, and what you think you will need to execute them.
For example – you are unhappy at your current job because a coworker has decided to once again throw you under the bus. This has happened in the past and it’s causing conflict in your work environment. You know you can’t change the person’s behavior…you can only change yourself. It’s to the point where you become paranoid, and it’s affecting how you do your job. The stress is so bad that it causes panic and anxiety attacks. Your health is at risk. You are having an “aha!” moment and realize that your physical and mental health are suffering because of the environment you are choosing to remain in. You ask yourself – do I stay or do I move on? Do I risk my financial comfort for a stress-free life?
That is IT! THAT IS IT!!! This is the time for you to abandon your fears and BANK ON THAT MOMENT! BANK ON YOUR AHA! MOMENT. Do not wait another day…the first step is acknowledging that this IS YOUR TIME, THIS IS YOUR MOMENT.
Have you had any “aha!” moments? What was the end result?
Leave your comments below and stay tuned for the next article of the Women in Transition series. I will discuss more in details about the steps it took to develop my business, identifying your skills, what strategies I implemented…and much more!